Love Is The Shit

Love will get you through.

Love is all you need.

What song is that? Anyways -

Chino and I really are going to be together forever and I have the proof. You guys already know that we endured our first 2 years of marrige in secret, (after having only known each other 2 months) that we endured a deportation scare, a year living in fear that it might happen at any moment and then actuall deportation, but not untill he spent a month and a half in immigration jail. We made it through the scare of him being dropped off at the border of a country he knew barely nothing about, just that it says he was born there on his birth cirtificate, and stayed strong through the next 6 months while he started making a life for himself and I stayed in Michigan to finish my job.

Talk about a long story short but here I am, I have been living in Mexico for 2 and a half months now. (two and a half when I wrot this it's been over 3 now but I'm just starting to post) Who would have thunk it, a hillbilly in Mexico.

Anyhow, evidence. The stuff above is enough to test anybody's relationship but we were just getting geared up. It wasn't even Mexico that was the first biggest probelm, it was Texas. I came from a really decent paying job that I LOVED with people that I loved in Mi and although I knew it would be impossible to replace the people I at least thought I would have no trouble getting another good job, hell a better job, with my updated resume. Ha. And let the games begin. It turns out that in a border town in Tx you sort of need to be billingual. You can't get a job in a gas station without speaking Spanish and here I am with my 100 word vocabulary. Shit.
It took me a month and a half of crossing the border 5 days a week, (nearly) and putting in applications and resumes 5 days a week (nearly) and slowly depleating our precious savings in that time all while getting more desperate and feeling more like a degenerate as each day passed. I don't know how some people can go 6 months without finding a job, SOMETHING, without going insane. It's hard now to put to words how I felt and how desperate I was at the end after being turned down after so many interviews. I'm kind of glad for that.

Thankfully though I found a job at a collections agency. Collections. Omg. And you've actually got to believe me when I say I was and AM thankfull to be working a job I hate for HALF the money I was making before. I am real damn thankful because we can EAT. I hate people yelling at me every day (all day) the annoyance and hate in their voices, or the people that cry or speak in fear or in the tone that says they have given up. Our calles are monitored and critiqued by our bosses and we're constantly being yelled at to pump people that are yelling or crying for MORE information. "I'm sorry your husband died, could you verify your SSN #??"

They told all of us trainees (we started on Dec 8th) that our first paycheck would be on Dec. 26th. You want to deflate a room of desperate but hopeful people quick, you tell them that there will be no cash for Christmas. I was pretty bummed that Chino and I wouldn't be able to exchange but a lot more so that I wouldn't be able to do anything for my family that is so far away. I thought maybe we could do a little something but then the next shoe dropped - my debit card was stolen and my bank account was drained and overdrawn. Ouch. Luckily we had some emergency cash in the house and Chino was working and I was going to get paid 2 days before rent was due. We were fine for food and gas till I was paid so we were fine, just no Christmas.

Chino's job then told him that they were going to lay him off for a few weeks and we got a little more worried because the car was also starting to make some funky noises. Chino ended up taking apart the brakes and looking at them to see what was up but they looked fine so we didn't know what was going on but that I had to show up to work 7 days a week or be fired. \(HA and after he put them back together they made TWICE as many funny noises!! :) )

Our dog got sick around this time and we actually had to take her to a mexican vet which I swore I wouldn't do but we thought one night that she wouldn't make it till the next day so we took her. Vets here are backward and 20 years behind and the doctor sent us home after asking a few questions with some vials and NEEDLES for us to give her shots. Uhh..... shots. Right. He asked my husband "Can she give her shots?" As in ME giving my teeny sweet dog SHOTS. Chino asked me and I just stuttered yes because I didn't want my dog to die but holy hell I don't know how to DO that! He showed me (why it was me and not my husband I don't understand, it's the way it went) and sent us on our way.

The first day wasn't so bad because she was too busted to notice but the folowing days when she started to feel better were terrible. We had to give her 2 shots in the morning and one at night. My poor little dog of course couldn't understand why we would hold her down so she just screamed and looked at me like a killer. After a few days when she was fine and we had a week of shots left I couldn't take it anymore and told Chino that she was either cured or would die because I wasn't giving her one more shot. (I would have taken her state side before I let her die but I was feeling dramatic.)

Did I mention that we hadn't been able to afford a hot water heater yet? It was first on our list when I got a job because as winter progressed the naturally warm water from the ground started turning colder and colder and we could no longer take showers. We've been heating water on the stove in a big pot, pouring it in a bucked with colder water and doing the dump-over-your-head bucked wash every night. It's not so bad.

The week after the dog got sick a crazy open isane WOUND just showed up on here shoulder and we thought she had flesh eating disease for a couple of days. Lol for that one it turnes out she just got a bad burn and she came out of it just fine but there's no hair on her shoulder any more - she's our ghetto mexican fo-sho now :)

It seems like in the midst of all of this there were 20 other smaller crisises (to us at least) but I can't bring them up right now in my head, maybe it was just all the stress of EVERYTHING snowballing and making it seem unending, I don't know. But through it all Chino and I were together like peas in a pod in a hurricane (mushy much??). We're still crazy about each other, we have more stress fights now, like those little spats that come out of nowhere for no reason? Yes those but at least we are able to see them for what they are afterwards (hell during but I have to be RIGHT so we finish damn it :) )

I have a ton and a half more to say, the worst is yet to come but so is the best, I hope you all are still out there, I am and I miss you. :)

I GOT A JOB !!!

YAAAAAAYYY!!!!!!! I can pay my car insurance and buy a hot water heater and INTERNET !!!!! Yaaaaaayyyyy!!!!!!!

Speaking of the hot water heater - OMG - C. said that a lot of people here don't have them, that it's usually so hot that the water that comes out of the ground is quite warm enough for showers. When I first got here he was right, the water was just warm enough to be nice and refreshing - BUT. But now it's getting down into the 50's and or colder at night, and unless it gets up to 85 the next day and stays there - the water is COLD !!! This past Sunday we went all stone age and actually heated water on our stove, put it in a bucket with colder water and did our thang in the shower.

Too funny, we moved into a much nicer house here than in MI and I'm taking a shower out of a bucket. LOL oh well I came from the boondocks, I'm cool with improvising. BUT !! Now that I've got a job we should be able to get a water heater in a couple of weeks. OH hooorraaaaayyyyy!!!

And Internet?? Did I mention that????? :)

OK, so the job. Um. LOL it's not exactly what I wanted but for right now it's cash and I'm ok with that.

It's a collection agency. . . . . . Do I hear Booo'ing??? Stop it ! OMG a collection agency, I KNOW !!! AAAHHHHHH!!!!!! But like I said, it's money. Oh lordy the interviewer told me there are several different areas of collection - one of them being mortgages. Please god don't give me THAT account !! I'll be fired in no time considering people have all but stopped paying mortgages in this country. Agggg.

Anywhoo, in about an hour I have another interview with a Customer Service center that works for Sprint. It's slightly more desirable than the collections place I think, but we'll see how they pay and what hours are offered. (and if they offer me a job too :P). Considering the kind of work it is I think they might but we'll see.

In the meantime I'll still keep looking for a nicer job but right now I'm just thankful to work.

Heavens to betsy I gotta run !! Wish me luck ! :)

Reasons Why Someone In Texas Should Give Me A Job

Because I need to buy a digital camera (my 3rd one in a year, I've got to stop killing these things) For I NEED to show you guys what I'm SEEING every day! Yesterday on the way to pick up C. there was a man riding down the street all cowboy'd out on his horse. For real, people ride horses down the same streets that 18 wheelers drive down and it's crazy to see.

I need to show you my HAIR that I tried to dye back to it's natural color after my red-faze - because it took the dye WAAAYYYY to seriously and now I look like I tried to dye my hair to look like a mexicans natural hair and I'm really fair skinned and I look like one 0f those old italian guys that just won't-give-it-up and still puts shoe polish in his hair to keep it greasy and black. My gawd I can't wear half of my clothes because the color clash is just too weird. Heaven help my hair.

And I need to SHOW YOU MEXICO - you need to see the insane streets with pot-holes the size of beach balls and swimming pools and then the speed bumps here that are so high that you get altitude sickness driving over them before you crash back down on the frame of your car.

OMG OMG and the construction site that lead my lane of traffic into ONCOMING traffic yesterday with the use of 4 orange cones and NO WARNING AT ALL to the oncoming people who all of a sudden had a wall of cars thrown at them for no apparent reason without notice and the pissed off looks on their faces because they thought it was crazy people (crazy white girl!) just driving the wrong way on a one-way. (I guess I can't capture the sound of car horns and me saying "holyshitholyshit-FOR REAL???" outloud by myself)

And you need to see the food and the people and my gaaawwdd the wonderful women here that wear 90% of their clothing 3 sizes too small at ALL times. I love these women they make my day nearly every day.

Ok so a camera is ONE reason but there's more but I'm running out of battery and I gotta go fax some applications. (sort of can't GET a job without applying :P)

Wish me luck so I can buy a camera!! (ok and food :P)

So You Know I Miss You Right??

I don't want to get internet in our house until I've got a job - prudent and all that.

(But I MISS you Blog-Pals!!)

I've been job hunting like a crazy person 5 days a week.

(Omg I seriously miss reading your blogs every day!!)

My dog got for real sick and almost kicked the bucket and I had to GIVE HER SHOTS and watch her like crazy and hand-feed and make sure she DIDN'T kick the bucket.

(and dag gummit it would have been nice to WRITE about it here while it was happening)

C. got bronchitis about a week and some days ago, I came down with the FLU about 5 days ago - HA !! So much for job hunting THIS week ! - AAAANNNDDDD my dog came up with this big weird gaping wound on her leg that seems to be spreading a couple of days ago.

So. (aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh)

There's all of that. I haven't been over to Tx to call any of my family because I've been too sick (hi family! I'm alive!)

Enough, enough, I'm sure you can see my blog pals - the ones I love to read and love to have visit me here that it's been a little nuts and computer time has been all but impossible - BUT - but I DO miss it and I WILL get back into it - just as soon as I can.

I hate it when my favorite bloggers take days or weeks (ahem - months) off and it always seems like even if they DO return it doesn't seem to be the same, or I've moved on to someone else that interests me. But it happens and I understand and hope you all understand.

I miss you, I miss my family, I miss so much - but just like everything else, when things get settled down I'll be in touch again.

Until then - (aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh)


XOXOXOXO's

SONS OF BITCHES RANT - And a happy ending

I put in an application and resume at a place last week - they called me a few days later and asked that I come in for an interview. YES ! I was excited, even excited the day of the interview when they called me 30 minutes beforehand to tell me that it was off. Very important office meeting popped up and no time for interviews but I could come in the next day. I said it was no problem at all - although I DID have to drop C. off at the bus station an hour before I would normally TAKE him to work to make the appointment and you know, I had already spent my 70 minutes at the border crossing and was paid up and crossed and only about 10 minutes away. (no I didn't tell her that :P) But ok, I understand.

So, the next day comes, the interview happens and it is explained to me that it's a 3 interview process - my my ! Well, 3 interviews IF I'm one of the 6 chosen from the first 20 and then one of the 4 chosen from the 6 - my very own little reality show. Blah blah anyways I'm chosen for a second interview and that was today. I went in for my second interview at 10 a.m. and they told me that there were only 5 of us and that they would forgo the 3rd meeting and make a decision today. YAY !! SOOOO I thought the interview went quite well and one of the interviewers told me that they would make the decision this afternoon and I would receive a call around 3:00 - 3:30 to tell me either way. Okay, great ! Actually he told me he would call me like THREE TIMES.

And. And now it's 4:18 and yeah I know it's only an hour or half hour late but, but, OH BUT COME ON! This is serious business people! This is my LIFE here and DAG GUMMIT I NEED TO KNOW IF I GOT THE JOB!!. ACK ! Do I even WANT to work for such rude people? Yeah yeah I know, important business probably "came up" but geez. Geez and dang and CRAAAAAAAAAAP.

UPDATE --- (It's the next day) Yeeeaaahhh 4:30 came and went as well as all last night and this morning - they NEVER called. How unimaginably rude, I mean REALLY? FUCK YOU ASSHOLES !!!!! JERK OFF SONS OF WHORES !! Dirty whores. With syphilis.

LOL my Mom said this morning "It's not like it was a bad DATE, they should have called you." AHAHAHAHAH My Momma is funny ! :P


Okay, Moving on. Happier things await.

EEEEEEE!!!!! I was scrapping the paint off of our iron gates yesterday when a neighbor lady from two houses down came to introduce herself and say HELLO to me !!! YYYAAAAYYY !!!!!! I can't tell you how dang THRILLED I was ! Granted, she didn't speak a lick of english but I had enough cave-man spanish to get us at least a little acquainted. You guys she came with a SMILE and a handshake and I was so damn happy !! I think we should KNOW our neighbors, not necessarily be best friends but it's rude to live 5 feet from them and not know their names damn it. It's just polite. Neighborly!

I've been WANTING to introduce myself to the neighbors but that whole language barrier thing kinda scared me off. "Hello neighbor!! HOLA!! Crazy white girl knocking at your door that you won't be able to understand, please don't call security on me I'm just trying to be neighborly!!" Anyways she told me that if I ever need anything or need help that she is just two houses down. OH !! How kind !! I told her the same thing back and we talked about her kids and husband and then she went back home.

I was so happy I stopped the paint scrapping and went to the task of baking some cookies so I could take them to her later to say thank you. I delivered the cookies later on and she was asleep but her son was there. He's 11 and speaks better english than I do and gave her the THANK YOU message.

Later on she came back with her son and he translated a whole conversation for us (that little kid is bad ass!) She's so nice and sweet and she told me that any time I'm home I can come over to her house and hang out so that I don't have to be by myself! ISN'T THAT NICE!!??? YAY!!!!!!!

So anyways, she liked my cookies and she brought the plate back and even gave me some fruit in return. How polite ! And I TALKED TO HER !! Ok so I mentioned that :P It's funny what one can get thrilled about when so isolated, but I'll take it where I can get it and remember to be thankful.

Who's the minority now?

A bit more on not being bilingual.

I knew that I would be in the minority race for the first time in my life when I moved here. I have no problem with that, whatever, we're people you know? But I have to admit I DID expect that when I crossed the border into Texas each day that I would be magically transported into a land of english speaking people again. Not necessarily a land of white people but at least I figured most everybody would speak english. It's our country's #1 language and all.

What I didn't realize is, is that by crossing that bridge into the U.S. I'm merely changing to better roads and different police. A border guard told me that it's anywhere from 70 - 90% spanish here on the U.S. side of the border, and while I think that's a little high (thought), I AM for real shocked that when I go to the gas stations and stores that many of the clerks don't even TRY to speak english. HERE, IN the U.S. - I had no idea. In the bigger stores they are bilingual - and damn good at it - but in the smaller places I'm spoken to primarily in Spanish. It's shocking to go to a gas station everyday to buy the morning paper to look for jobs and be told my total in Spanish.

I find myself in the Office Depot (printing and faxing resumes) talking to the bilingual girl behind the desk and realizing that I've become one of "THOSE" people. You THOSE people who give perfect strangers too much information and out-stay their welcome by talking about crap that the clerk doesn't care about for too long. Yeah. I hate those people. I didn't think I would ever do that - even when I was OLD ! But I find myself desperate to speak to someone that understands me and I can understand in return. Besides the border guards. Gahhh.

Yes, I call my Mom and Dad and BFF but there is something about talking in person with someone that humans need. C. is wonderful but he's not always around and dang it girls need other girls to talk to you know? :P It's true. Boo-hoo and woe-is-me I want a girlfriend. God please give me a job soon, lol at least those people HAVE to talk to me, even if it's just work related.

Speaking of - I went for my first job interview last week and there in the waiting room were TWO other women OBVIOUSLY there for the same job as I. Awkward much? I mean REALLY??? I can't really stand that sort of thing so when one of them asked me the time I took the opportunity to open up some conversation between us.

We all got the big elephant in the room out and kicked him to the side. The first girl and I talked some about being new people in the area and my nerves - as well as hers I'm sure - really started to calm down. When she went in for her interview I started up a conversation with the other woman - God bless the always viable convo-opener of "I really like your shirt!" :p I did though, it wasn't a lie.

And like magic!? She and I started talking about allllll SORTS of things - ending up on the subject of MEN for heavens sake and me pointing my finger at her and lecturing her (a woman 15 years older than me) about how she shouldn't be pining away for an obviously crappy man that was treating her like shit. I told her that she was a princess - a QUEEN and should be treated so - and NOTHING less. EVER. She felt bad that she's divorced and older and is afraid that she's a spinster and I has all sorts of confidence-boost stuff to throw at her for that. :) I swear nothing gets me fired up more than a mistreated woman that's had her self confidence worn down to nil.

SO anywhoo, we had a great conversation and by the time it was my turn to be interviewed all ov my nerves were gone and I felt great. The INTERVIEW went great and the woman told me that I was her absolute first choice - that she would REALLY like to offer me the job - but I need to be more bilingual. She even went so far as to suggest that she might try to shuffle some people around to find a place for me! I was really flattered - she said I seem like "A real go-getter!" HA !! Who would have thunk it!

Anyways, the second woman I was speaking with was professional and actually lived a lot closer to the job than I - and was bilingual. I told her that she would be more suited for the job than I, just the Gods truth.

No worries though - today I have TWO interviews and I'm hopeful about both of them, I don't think the bilingual thing will come into play as much and am really hopeful.

Wish me luck! And thanks to you all who are still reading, I appreciate it, I feed off of it. Thank You :)

FUMIGRATION!!!!!

Yesterday when I was done job searching for the day and was back home alone I was in the kitchen when I heard a knock at our fence outside. I don't like it when people come to our house when C. is gone, I usually have JUST enough english to get by I guess I DO manage, but never as well as I'd like. I guess the textbook he gave me for our first Christmas really IS coming in handy now. :P

Yesterday was a shining goofy example of my lack of Spanish though. I wearily walked to the front door to peak my head out and saw a man behind our gate with some paperwork. He immediately launched into rapid-fire spanish and I couldn't get in a "UHHH" or "DUHH" or "NO HABLO" anywhere for like what seemed forever. I could tell he was asking me questions and he wanted answers, and it was making me nervous. I heard a word a few times and finally my brain registered it as "Immigration."

IMMIGRATION !!! AHHHHH!!!!!! I immediately thought "Holy shit! Immigration has come for me! HOW did they find me? WHY? I've got to run away!" LOL riiiigggghhhhttt like I could run away. Dork.

He stopped for a half second and I said - ???? Immigration ???? and he kept rapid firing that damn word at me but finally my head was starting to register something else. "igracion" "umigracion" "Fumigracion" "Fumigacion (Fum-i-grah-see-own) OHHHHHH !!! Fumigation !!!! He was a Bug-killer salesman !

AH !! AAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAH !! SHIT !! And he scared the crap out of me! LOL I don't know why but he kept repeating it over and over FUMIGACION-FUMIGACION-fumigacionfumigacion! Strage.

Anyhoo I finally understood, said "Ohhhh !!" "Fumigacion!?" "NO GRACIAS !!" I smiled and shut the door. Good bye !

There's no REASON that immigration would come after me - and lord knows they wouldn't come toting a clip-board but instead big guns - but my lil ole brain is programmed to be worried about it I guess, after the couple of years with C. in the U.S.

Fumigation - HA ! He's two weeks too late, I hauled my cats and dog and C. over to his Aunts house the first full day I was there and bug-bombed the hell out of that place. We STILL have bugs dying - it's a long-killing formula safe for animals. I don't get how it works and I don't care, I'm just glad that the only mouse-sized cock-roaches I see are dead ones. *shudder*