Monday, August 31, 2009

Random Marital Groping

Picture it, Mexico, 2009 . . .
In the car on the way to the market and my husband is feeling me up for the hell of it. I'm showing a little leg and he's helpless, can't blame him. I wouldn't want him to feel left out so I grab his nip and squeeze. Fairs fair beotch. He retaliates by grabbing a whole chi-chi and out of nowhere squeezing and making a fire-hose noise and pretends he's spraying the windshield down with my future milk. Huh.

"SSSHHHHHHPPPPSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH" "All over de place, dats what I'm going to do."

"Yeah well I'll spray it in your coffee."

*silence* *weird look at me* *staring back out the windshield*

"What you're not that grossed out are you? I won't put it in your coffee."

"Coffee?" "OOHhhhh that's not what I thought you said."

"That I'll put it in your coffee?"

"I thought you saeed ju were going to spray eet on my cock."

*Blink* "Oh." *Blink Blink* Aaaaaaaand Speechless!


Wonder where HIS mind was? WOW. Just wow.




14 comments:

Refried Dreamer said...

damn beaners.... wonder where they learned their english. hehe....

cheers to coffee n cream.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

He sure as hell bought the cow now!

Suki said...

Hahahahahaha!

Fishsticks and Fireflies said...

AWESOME! Breastmilk is a bit thin for lubrication, but it does work in a pinch. Or so I've heard.

Krissie said...

Wait, what?!

KINKY.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Suki - He's crazy! :P

F&F - I never gathered the PHREAK vibe from your blog but HEY! just goes to show. . . :P

Krissie - I'd bet money there's fic about it.

Andrew said...

Did you ever see that episode of Taxicab confessions with the lady that had a boob job which triggered her milk in her breasts and now she always has milk? She pulled her top down and squirted her milk and said there are groups that like breastmilk involved with sex... Maybe Chino saw that episode? :o)

Krissie said...

You win, hands down.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Andrew - So someone else watches that show besides me? C's not much for trivia shows, no, he just thinks I'm dirty. Smart man.

Krissie - I wonder if we can come up with anything there ISN'T fic / porn about? That would be the real challenge.

Sunshine said...

OMG.....ok, im a lactation consultant....that was so funny!
We put breastmilk on everythang! goopy eyes, goopy nose, ear aches, mosquito bites, rash, ouchies, uhhhhh you name it :)

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Sunshine - For REAL !? On goopy eyes? And cuts and scrapes and rashes? Is it antibacterial or something? Cool becuase neosporin is expensive. Will it patch a flat tire?

Sparx said...

Haha!!! OK, now I'm reading through and I totally MISSED that you're knocked up - I've not been blogging for ages now and er, well, that's it really.

I love that you can still actually shock your man!

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Sparx - can I ever! actually he doesn't quite KNOW the extent of my . . . openness? Is that a good word? DIRTY he has no idea how dirty a mind I have and if he did his heart would stop. Maybe someday. :P

Krissie said...

I wonder if we can come up with anything there ISN'T fic / porn about?

No.