Monday, September 21, 2009

Men In Shorts - I Can't Take Them Seriously

Can anyone take a man wearing shorts seriously? This morning at the border crossing one of the agents - these super-serious-I'll-take-your-head-off-for-sneezing men - was wearing his govt. issue and approved shorts. From the knees up it's the standard black uniform with gun, flashlight and 20 other things strapped on around his belt with the serious shirt and badge and everything. But somebody cut his pants off from the knees down and I could clearly see his CHICKEN legs and the hairiness of them and how they led down into his govt. issue black socks and black shoes.

Flattering, really.

There's something about seeing his legs out in the open that makes me think vulnerable and . . . "Hahahahaha he's got chicken legs!" He doesn't scare me the way he should. Put on some pants man.

The men here in Mexico don't wear shorts like the men of the U.S. it's not La Moda (the fashion.) It's not seen as respected and I can glimpse why. At first I thought it was weird to see every man on the street in 105 degree weather wearing heavy pants, but you get used to it. My husbands the same way, I couldn't drag him outside in shorts for all the tortillas in Mexico.

I'm not saying there's anything wrong with men in shorts but for me they always look like little boys. That is of course unless you're the Magnum P.I. sort of man, and then you just look like a pervert. Sorry, but Magnum was the last man to look good in shorts. My dad wears Magnum P.I. daisy duke cut-off jean shorts - the kind where the pocket hangs out the bottom and if he didn't wear undies his balls would fall out. But my dads an old nekkid hippie and lives out in the country and stays out of public that way. And I love him, so he's ok. :P The rest of you? I'm not going to take you seriously. It'd be like taking a lady cop in a tube top serious, just not gonna happen.

19 comments:

Krissyface said...

I hate that I always have to say, "Yes, I understand that there might be mature content on this blog" before I can enter it. I mean, I drop the f-bomb liberally on my blog and I don't have any disclaimer.

Nowthen. Men in shorts, gross. Keep your hairy froglegs to yourself, thank you.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Krissyface - I don't HAVE to have the disclaimer but blogger offered it and I took it because I was having like a 2 second guilty moment thinking about the link I have to here on my Myspace and how I have young-cousins as friends on myspace and OF COURSE they're going to "continue" but I can at least say I warned them. Actually I hate it too, I have to click it just to get here to post.

Froglegs - Haa :PPP

Vadose said...

Ha! My husband wears shorts all the time, more often than pants. AND he's got chicken legs! (And he fully knows it.) Somehow it fits his image, though, board shorts or other such trendy attire, a graphic T, his expensive brand name shades, and flip flops! Not your typical Mexican attire, esp. here in San Juan. I love it though, he's so trendy (totally unlike me). It's because he lived in a beach town in California since he was a teenager. He always looks ready for the beach. Too bad we don't have one here. hahaha!

Upstate Broad said...

We have friends in Barbados, and they tell us about dealing with very serious businessmen in dress shirts, ties and Bermuda-style shorts. Go figure. I think it helps if they at least look decent in shorts. Chicken legs and pasty legs should definitely be kept under cover!

Fishsticks and Fireflies said...

Dude. My husband used to be a cop in an oceanfront town and routinely did his patrol in shorts - along with the hefty belt and gun. The fact that he was allowed to wear tennis shoes did nothing to negate the fact that he was wearing shorts. He doesn't have chicken legs, but they are really hairy. Just so wrong.

I am glad you posted this - I have often wondered about the Hispanic men around here who ALWAYS wear pants . . . now I know it is culteral and not just how they hid their sawed-off shot-guns. (Was that racist?)

Leslie Limon said...

My hubby wears shorts from late February to late October. We lived in sunny Southern California, so it was hot all year round. Thankfully he doesn't wear those Magnum or Richard Simmons shorts, I don't think I could stand it. Our move to Mexico didn't change his sense of "style". Although...my father-in-law complained about the shorts for about 2 years. Now everyone jokes that my hubby will be wearing shorts even when he's in his 60's, just like Chabelo.

Refried Dreamer said...

My hubby too. He wouldn't wear shorts for the life of him! Finally about a year or so ago, I got him some of those longer shorts... where they're like cargos and resemble pants. He wears them once and awhile... and if he does look a little, uh, un-gangster... the tattoos on his legs bring back his credibility.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Vadose - Well hell at least he's stylish about it. So your man is the stylish one of the pair too? I can be stylish if something stylish to be bought is in a thrift store and it fits me and I buy it by accident not because it's sylish but because it fits me and it's cheap. Otherwise I don't understand the whole concept.

Upstate - eeeeew, just no, it reminds me of bad porn

F&F - When you mentioned your husband was a cop and wore shorts I thought you were going to be pissed off :P WHEW! But you were cool about it :) And no, not racist, you're always welcome to be funny (or serious, hell maybe it's true) at this blog. :)

Leslie - LOL to the complaining for two years, that's too dang funny! But I'm glad he stuck to it, we gotta be ourselves here. :)

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Refried - OOoooo but a cool dude like him can get away with it. ESPECIALY with those tatoo's! I'm surprised he didn't wear the gangsta shorts before, just to show them off! He get's a cool vote.

Upstate Broad said...

Apparently, our former neighbor's kids were thoroughly Americanized. While in the Hudson Valley of NY, we lived next door to a couple who immigrated from MX and had 3 kids, all born here. They just could NOT get the oldest boy (Jr. high age) into long pants. We're talking near-zero temps in Jan. & Feb., multiple feet of snow on the ground and Luis would be walking to school in his shorts. They were past his knees, but nowhere near his ankles. Maybe in the Hudson Valley, that's how you prove how tough you are... Geez, I haven't thought about him in years!

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Upstate - Awwwwww that's cute, sounds like one of those weird teenager-phases-that-keeps-going things :) OR he was a gangsta!

Sunshine said...

My hubs wears shorts....but they are the long cargo type shorts...i like them better than jeans....man it's to damn hot around here to wear jeans 24/7....ummmm he even has some plaid cargo's....from Guess outlet! Dont hate on my short wearing hubs....lol!
((hugs))

tuhmeesuh said...

lol, my hubby doesnt wear shorts too often, but i surely brought him a few pair for the homecoming lol. now to pry him into them is another story.

he will wear 100% cool shorts, of course. :)

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Tuhmeesuh - For the homecoming - how long away? I felt real reverb with you when I first read about you waiting for him. When they're worth it they're worth it and we do what we gotta do. You're a neat lady. :)

Suki said...

:snort:

I love you. For making me laugh :D

Kellysmakeupandmore said...

Yeah my hubby wears shorts but not the SHORT ones ur talking about,
OH NO!!! I would not go outside with him if he did! but most of the time, he wears pants,
he don't have those HAIRY kinda legs either EWWW I hate to see it when he gets older...lol
and im proud to say, that he don't have frog legs OR chicken legs lol

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Suki - I love you too, cuz you're cool. :P

Kelly - Wanna know a dirty secret? I LIKE the hairy legs! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! And I didn't know how much other women DON'T until they started commenting here about it being gross :P I like the fuzzy warm feel of it when they're next to MY legs :D MMMmmmmmmm

Ritamg said...

Your blog is just too funny. I wish we could prioritize the blogs. Yours would be at the top.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Ritmag - Awwww that's nice of you :) And thank you so much! :)