Sunday, September 6, 2009

Weird Pregnancy Shit They Don't TELL You About: Part 2

*Thank You again for all the comments on the first blog about weird pregnancy symptoms, they mean a lot! I wasn't finished before and I'm back with the rest, if you know a first time prego I encourage you to share what ever you can with her, stick together yall. If you're sadistic then just e-mail her these posts (including the comments, that's where the GOOD shit is!) that'll give her a jumpstart. :P*


Food Aversions. I had always heard of food CRAVINGS and I thought it was going to be the most fun part of pregnancy. :P There's only been one time during the pregnancy where I had a craving and it DID crack me up. I was walking around Dollar General for miscellaneous crap and spotted cans of sardines. I decided right then and there I COULD NOT leave the store with out at least 3 cans of mustard sardines and I thought I would surely eat them all upon arriving home. When I walked over to the frozen section and saw the Gordons Fishsticks my brain said SCREW the sardines "YOU WILL NOT SURVIVE unless you eat a box of fishsticks!!!" I went strait home with my fishy fishes but by the time I got there the cravings were gone. I should have eaten the sardines right there in the store, I have an idea it would have been the best food I'd ever eaten. Ah well, Chino had a white people favorite that night of "sticks and stones" (fish sticks and tater tots.)

The AVERSIONS though. Holy CRAP!! My Mom had told me that the smell of fried eggs drove her bat shit when she was pregnant with me but I had NO IDEA just how so until I was knocked up myself. Plus I didn't have a CLUE that I could develop aversions to half of the food in the world. I expected one or two things. Ha, hahah, bwwaaaaaaaaaaahahah. Right! Chicken, my favorite of favorites all of a sudden turned into an evil alien smelling creepy food that I will NOT touch. I've had to go in the other room while Chino eats because of the smell (and I'm not a dramatic type person! this is so NOT for attention) and once on the way home from Walmart I bought one of those rotisserie chickens (god I used to love those!) and actually put it in the trunk of the car to avoid the smell on the way home. The trunk didn't help all that much, I could still smell it and was sick by the time I got home. Girls - THIS is pregnancy!

Soon after chicken turned into something monstrous all other meats shortly followed suit. I remember sitting down to dinner with Chino one night, taking a bite of my favorite beef-taquito dish, putting my fork down and thinking "Huh. I don't for the life of me want another bit of that beef." It's not like it smelled bad but there was this THING in my brain somewhere that threat end to turn my stomach inside out if I ate one more bite of the suddenly EVIL food on my plate. Chicken, Pork, Beef, Fish (goodbye fishsticks!) and then on to stranger things like avacado, pico de gallo and to the horror of women everywhere - CHOCOLATE. Even beans and eggs dropped off my eatable list and I was left with nothing but fruit and bread for a couple of months. I got all freaked out worried about the fact that I was eating like, no protein or iron so I started drinking Slim Fast along with my fruity lunches and dinners. :P People look at you funny when you're pregnant and drinking Slim Fast.

Six months in I can eat certain meats again if they're prepared the right way and don't look to . . . meaty. But Chicken? These days I hold a secret theory that there's something WRONG with chicken and maybe it's not such a good thing for people to eat after all. Chickens are aliens, and their meat holds a creepy evil place in my heart and I'm not sure I'll ever want to eat it again. THAT is pregnancy, pregnancy is freakin weird.

I've got more but after writing about chicken, I'm done for the day. Yeeeeaaallck.


jenny said...

haha!! that was a funny picture-- a pregnant lady drinking slimfast! I bet it was the same look I got when I was pregnant and buying wine bottles! ( I was making that strawberry wine, remember?)

Yeah those food issues are weird. When I was preggo with #3, all I craved was coke.. after checking to make sure it was ok (the husband was worried), I limited myself to one can of coke a day. We call #3 our coke baby! LOL! (Imagine the looks we get when we say that!) She LOVES coke and begs for a sip of mine when she sees it.

Krissie said...

Don't hate on chicken. They did you no harm.

Sunshine said...

What about the feeling that your whoohaaa is like 10 times fuller than it was before you got prego' all the blood is rushing towards that area! OMG i felt like it was a balloon that some one would'nt stop blowing up. You might not feel that yet...maybe towards the end...or maybe its cause ive had 4 babies! Ok not to scare you!
sorry..but u gotta know about this

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

OH Jenny - WINE bottles? :P Ahhhhhahahah and I feel funny just walking down the alcohol isle to get to the chips :P Coke baby gaahhhh :)

Krissie - I think they'd like to though. I'm staying away from the tramps.

Sunshine - Not yet but I imagine it's coming - thank you :)