Friday, October 23, 2009

Bird Update and Fireworks

Remember the post about The crazy assed birds stalking me at work? (why is that link not underlined??)
Well, it took a while but they've followed me home. I live about 8 miles away (as the crow flies *snort*) and for the past two weeks, every night a tad before sunset flock after flock of these birds show up outside of our house. No, I don't know if they're the same exact birds, they can't be right? *hands over ears LALALALALA* But it's the same kind and here they are night after night. They hang out infront of our house, on both sides and in the back, they've got me surrounded like SWAT.
It's kinda cool for about the first half hour, Chino and I will go and sit outside and watch them fly in and take roost in the trees. I enjoy watching the boy birds try and be all bad assed and puffed up doing they're I'm-so-sexy dances and tweets for the girl birds. They get to bobbin their heads and I wait for the girl bird to look around like "oh my god" and fly away. Too cute. (If we sit outside and watch birds ever night NOW what are we going to do when we're old??)

Like I said, it's great for the first half hour or so and then things start to get LOUD. That many lil birdies make a shit load of noise - constant and the SAME - and it starts to drive me batty. I fantasize all the time about throwing out a few packs of firecrackers and watching them all fly away to leave me in peace again.

Ok so I went LOOKING for firecrackers to buy. Can someone PLEASE tell me where all the damn FIREWORKS are?? When white people think Mexico we think three things - Tequila, Tacos and fireworks. This is supposed to be where the GOOD fireworks are now where the HELL are they?!? I can't very well throw tacos at the damn birds so fess up Mexico, where's the good shit? Just what the hell?

Is this not a firework town? WWHHHYYYYYYY would I move from a state (Mi) that doesn't allow fireworks cooler than snakes and sparklers - and oooooo fountains - to a part of another damn country that doesn't even SELL snakes and sparklers. DAMN IT. I used to drive 5 hours round trip to Illinois a couple times a year and smuggle back a trunk load of the GOOD SHIT fireworks so my Mom and Dad and my friends and I could blow shit up in style - but now I don't know where to go.


Stupid Texas and SILLY MEXICO I want to screw with some darn BIRDS!!

Tantrum anyone?

I guess I could light tequila on fire and pitch it at them. There's always that.


jenny said...

I remember when I lived in MD, during the 4th of july, the police would actually set up a barricade on the border of MD and DC to check for fireworks. They sold them in DC, but MD didn't allow them. I thought that was so stupid.

Isn't there a lot of birdshit by your house now?? Eww! Don't park under that tree!

Krissyface said...

that there's a retarded amount of birds. It's like a Hitchcock movie.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Jenny - LOL no, no birdshit on the house they actually won't cross the street to where we are - this is SO weird! They just sit on the other side and chatter at us. And no, def. don't park under the tree :PPP

Krissy- RIGHT!?? And the pictures are stupid and don't even give the TRUE idea! They love me, what can I say?

Sgt said...

I'm torn. On one hand, the thought of wasting tequila makes me cringe and scream alcohol abuse! The other slightly more pyro side of me has the beavis and butthead laugh in my as I picture flaming birds trying to get away from a Molotov cocktail tossing crazy pregnant chick.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Sgt. - I love how you describe things, you've such a knack for it. :P

Sparx said...

Maybe they're just watching out for Daisy - maybe she's a crow goddess!