I posted HERE about my husbands brother and cousin being kidnapped by the mafia back in August. I feel the need to give and update and SAY something about it because how can I not SAY something about it - but nothing has happened. They're gone and ever since the last phone call a week after they were taken we haven't heard a thing and neither have the police.
It's been two months and I know damn well they're not coming back but I don't want to just up and close the book on them, how can a person DO that? I want to keep thinking maybe they'll show up one day. They were good decent people, hardworking and had nothing to do with any of the trouble that caused their kidnapping - why is the mafia so evil that they take innocent people to punish the guilty? Obviously the guilty people DON'T CARE. This whole thing is incomprehensible, I just, God it's just insane you know?
Chino and I don't talk about it. I don't know how to bring it up or even if I should. About a month after they were gone he trolled the Internet every night looking for reports of dead bodies found here where we live and across the border where they were taken and I assumed that he too had given up thinking they were going to come home alive. At what point do we accept that they are gone and that they are dead without seeing a body? Are we bastards for giving up after 2 months or is this normal? Should there be a funeral? I don't know how any of this works!
I can't imagine what this is like for Chino and his dad and other brothers and I wish I could know what's going on inside my husbands head so that I could do something to help him through this but I haven't a clue. I don't know if I should ask him - maybe he WANTS me to ask him so he can talk about it - or maybe he's thinking I'm some kind of crappy wife because I never talk about it and maybe he thinks I've forgot - OR maybe he's better being left alone to deal with it and try to forget about it. God, I just don't know anything.
Ok. Enough flipping out, if I don't stop myself I'll keep droning on for page after page and nobody needs that. Just hug your loved ones ok? I don't care if it sounds cliche - you NEED to be thankful for everyday you get with your family and friends - BE AWARE that you are thankful and BE AWARE of how much they mean to you and don't forget it - shit really does happen to normal people.