Thursday, January 14, 2010

Dear Lord This Sucks, Anybody Want A Brown Baby?

It looks like Daisy has Colic. The for real kind where she cries for hours and hours on end and there's nothing we can do about it. Yesterday in the emergency room when the doctor told me what was up and that there's nothing they can really do, that all we can do is wait it out, I think I felt my brain unravel a little bit.

Colic has a few different definitions and Daisy seems to fall into the cry-inconsolably-for-more-than-THREE HOURS - category. Last night her tirade lasted from 7p.m. to 12:30a.m. nonstop.

How does she not lose her voice? 5.5 hours of screaming nonstop and she doesn't lose her voice? Dear lord this is beyond belief, where is the Guinness Book people when you need them?

The books and the Internet say that Colic isn't painful, that it MAY be that the babies nervous system isn't developed and that they just can't stop, but the Doctor yesterday said it's just about as painful as giving birth.

No matter what the case, it's horrid because she does appear to be in great pain, like something is stabbing her over and over and yet I'm losing my gourd because of the crying. I feel terrible for her and end up crying right along with her but after a few hours just want her to stop SO BADLY.

Don't worry I'm not depressed or even really baby-blues-y so she's not in danger of me going psycho, it's just that this is beyond my wildest dreams of shittyness.

Anybody ever have a colicky baby? Any advice? I know we have to just wait it out but is there any way to not go stark raving mad while doing so? I considered taking up drinking but I'm clumsy enough and I don't want to be dropping her and falling down the stairs. Bummer.

Amanda (sunshine) I took her out in the stroller like you suggested and she actually did stop crying while we were out there - amazing to say the least! HA I'm going to become known as that strange white lady wheeling around her newborn outside in the rain and cold for 12 hours each day while her husband is at work. ( I was actually scared that if she screamed the whole time I wheeled her around that they might call the policia on me! )

Anyways, it seems the morning bout is over for now, she only went from 9:30a.m. to 2:00 p.m. this time so that's nice, an hour less than last night. DAMN IT can someone tell me how a one month old can stay awake for 10 hours a day?? SHIITTT.

I'm not going back to the online "support" groups for colic by the way, because they're all too frightening. It's just a bunch of poor women listing how many hours a day and how many months their babies have been screaming and that they've tried everything and nothing helps. Nice. We've got Daisy the anti-colic bottles, nipples and gas drops but. . . well, I sound like the message board moms, shoot me now.

I told her this morning that she better get to growing that nervous system of hers quick or I'm going to put her ass on E-bay. Okay, no, I don't want to go to jail but I DID inform my husband last night that I'm considering giving her to the neighbors. The neighbors won't WANT her but there's always that baby-on-the-door-step deal that I might be able to work out. Where's my basket??

26 comments:

Corey said...

My babies didn't have colic. But I know what the crying feels like. Kiera and Maggie bothe went through it for a while, but not as bad as poor Daisy. During teh night I usually layed Maggie on the loveseat with the ottoman infront so I could kindof lay down like a recliner beside her. since I was sitting up I didn't worry about rolling over on her, and she couldn't roll off. I would just sit with her and watch t.v. or read a book or just sit with a low light on untill one of passed out. I had no choice I still had to deal with the other 2 girls in the morning. After so long I would get so exhausted that I would just pass out wether she was crying or screamming bloddy murder. Eventually I would wake up because it was quiet. But I never moved her till she woke up or I had to. I slept a many night half sitting half laying on the love seat with Mags beside me. If my ears started to hurt I would just put an earplug in the ear facing her. I know It sounds sad but you do what you gotta do. Chino just has to take over for you as soon as he gets home so you can sleep or decompress. With Lily, Jason left for cruise for 6 weeks then came home for 3 weeks then left again for 6 months. So at least you still have Chino. Remember we were in California when Lily was born. I finaly called "Uncle" and went back to michigan till he came back to the US. I know it seems like it will never end but it will. Just remember to Cherish every second wether they are good or bad moments. Almost all new moms go though the problems you are. Not always to this extreme but we can relate to you and understand all that you are saying and feeling. You are not alone in these feelings. My oldest is 8 and I'm still trying to get rid of her most days. ♥ You.

La Familia Garcia said...

wow, I know that is frustrating! My son had colic for 6 weeks. It doesn't seem that long, but to me, it was SOO long!! It got better over time though. My suegra told me to try manzanilla about 2 oz warm. It helps their tummy. Also you could try swaddling her if you don't already. That does wonders.
I visit first time parents and help with stuff like this. If you can, look for this book "the happiest baby on the block."
Good luck!!

Refried Dreamer said...

awwww... poor brown baby! I heard manzanilla works too. Our Little One had colic. It was horrible. We tried gas drops and rubbing baby's belly and backside to help him out. good luck.

Crystal said...

Poor Daisy and poor you! My babies did not have colic. Did the Dr. say if you could do anything? If I hear of anything I will let you know. Do you have anyone to help you during the day? Don't worry (i know that it is easy to say) maybe and hopefully it will not be too long. Ok i just looked something up and it said that breastdeeding mothers shoudl avoid milk,caffeine, onions, cabbage, beans, broccoli, and other gas producing foods.
Also, it says to give them water.
Overfeeding can be a cause.
What about Gripe Water- I am sure you would have to get it at a pharmacy in the US unless they have it at one in Mexico.
They say maybe repetitive movement. I know my son had gas a couple of times and I would lay him across my knees- stomach down and just kind of bounce him not hard just a little jiggle, you know not hard at all, his head would not even be moving while i would bounce him. If you try that be careful because she is still so little. Check out these sites- coliccalm.com medicinenet.com and kidshealth.org
Let me know if any of this works.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Corey - Earplugs, that's a damn good idea, at least take it down a notch right? God you had to be alone for 6 weeks? I remember when you came back home but at the time I didn't comprehend why - NOW I do. Good lord I don't know how single moms do it. I'd go batshit. I can't imagine what it was like after Maggie had surgery! I can't stand to see Daisy cry for gas let alone surgery, that's beyond what I can even grasp -it puts a thing like colic in perspective to the bigger picture (at least till the 5the 5th hour of crying and then my perspective is a tad scewed no matter what :p )

La F G - Thank you for the book rec. - I'll keep my eye out fo sho!

Refried - 6 weeks? Fuck a duck.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Crystal - awww you're so sweet to look all that up, I need to find that gripe water, it's worth a try :) Oh! and snshine recomends the stomach/knee thing too but I just seem to piss her off more with it, dag gummmit.

Mama of 4 said...

I too used Manzanilla tea with my little ones although they did not have colic as bad as your poor baby. It's worth a try.

Leah said...

I just wanted to throw my two cents in: both my boys had colic and the Grip Water definitely helped. It didn't completely eliminate the screaming bouts, but it did decrease the frequency and the intensity. Also, this sounds crazy, but I bought the Fisher Price Ocean Wonders Soothe and Glow Seahorse. It was recommended to me by a group of moms on a message board and worked wonders for about half of them. It happened to work insanely well for my son - I can't explain why, but a lot of babies seem to love this thing. I was really skeptical, but at one point I nearly went crazy and I though, "Hell, it certainly can't hurt." I got one, and it turned out to be the best thing I've ever purchased for him. At any rate I know how you feel, and I hope it gets better for you soon!

Larry Prater said...

You can leave her on my door step any time, and then pick her up when you are ready for her again. Good luck and I hope you both get sleep soon.

Leslie Limon said...

Have you taken her to a pediatrician in Mexico. My son Jack had colic for about a week and one of my hubby's uncle, who is a doctor, prescribed some drops for him. They worked like a charm!

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Mama f 4 - Yes,afer much freaking out on my part I let my husband give her some a few times - no dice - but no harm done either so it's all good. Thank You :)

Leah - I love your two cents!! I'd love to get that ocean toy but it might no be in the budget, althoug I might be willing to not eat for a week ig it would help :Prry - You are such a dear, but she would drive away your spa clients and I know yu need them! :)

Leslie - The Mexico doctors scare the shit out of me but it does always seem like they have either a shot or drops for everything :P One here SWEARS he can take away my allergies forever if I take his drops for 20 days - and my husbands family swears it's true!!

Mr. la

Crystal said...

No problem, if I can give advice (or look up advice) then I do not mind at all. I know that it is tiring just taking care of a newborn without colic. I can just imagine how stressed you must feel and since it is your 1st baby it makes it a little harder. I know when I had my 1st I was on the phone with my grandmother all the time. I hope you get some rest today.

Krissie said...

Suddenly I'm pretty glad I don't live next to you. :P

Sandrine said...

Hi Gringa,

I have the Fisher Price Ocean Wonders crib toy.It was given to me when my youngest son Max was born (he is 3 now) and I never really used it.I can mail it to you if you want it.My email is:
jefsaraurmax@hotmail.com
Take care.

Sandrine

Kristi said...

I ahve had a few friends go through this and it sounds so hard to deal with :( Just remember that it doesn't mean you are a bad mom at all, there might not be much you can do. One friend saw every specialist for her colicky baby and once she modified her own diet (because she was breast feeding)to eliminate wheat and dairy products, the baby was 100% better

Lian said...

I have 4 kids and the 3 older ones were not much of a problem. My youngest baby (now 4 months old) has a bit of reflux and so I've had to go through more crying than I'm used to. When she has her "crying attacks', I find the Sleepy Wrap baby carrier helps. It puts her to sleep faster than all my other methods. I have compiled a long list of baby colic remedies. Care to check it out? http://valuebookshop.com/2009/colic-baby-remedies/
I hope you find something that works.

Sunshine said...

I'll take Miss Daisy...bring her on over.....she is always welcome here! Your the bestest mama in the whole world. God new that you would be the best mama for Daisy...he knew that you could handle a colicy baby....hang in there it WILL get better.
huggssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssand more huggggggssssssssssssss

Vadose said...

Ah! Yeah, shitty, isn't it? I wish I lived next door so I could give you a break. Mine had reflux really badly and would cry for it. Just keep telling yourself that eventually she'll get over it! The only two things that worked for me were taking Hanix for walks in the street and nursing him pretty much all the time. So yes, everyone in town probably does know me as the white woman who walks around with the crying baby. I tried cutting oh- pretty much everything out of my diet to see if that worked. It's worth a try, but for me it just meant I was exhausted AND starving so I scrapped the diet thing since it didn't seem to make a difference in our case. Remember it will end, and try to give yourself some recoup time. Would one of your in-laws baby-sit for an hour or two once in a while? It's hard enough to be all alone with a baby all day, but when they're crying it makes it one thousand times more difficult. Hang it there!!

Greta Adams said...

i had a colic baby and when we switched formula and i changed my diet because i was breast feeding and formula feeding as well it was all good in the hood. try giving her gas drops before she eats and maybe changing her formula to something else...i went through 5 formulas before we found the right one...she ended up needing Enfimil AR

good luck..and you can ship her to me...i'll take her :)

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Krissie - Hor. ( ;D )

Sandrine - That's such a kind thing to offer, I wonder how far away you are from us to be sending it? I'll e-mail you for sure! :)

Kristi - I've screwed up breast feeding so royally that my milk is just about gone and she's on formula so no dice with me changing foods, but I do appreciate the mention :)

Lian - I will most definetly check that out! Thank You! :) And good luck with YOUR baby! :)

Sunshine - You're so sweet, but no, not the best mama. Good intentions yes - but the rest - I'm retarded.

Vadose - Isn't it crazy that walking around in the house doesn't help but walking outside - even in the cold and dreary weather totally works? I don't get it but hell if it works it works. :) Thank You for your experienced advice :)

Greta - Thank You so much for the formula name! If we do a switch I know where we'll start! :)

Vadose said...

Hey, Gringa - If you have a half a mind to breastfeed Daisy, there's a real good chance that with some support you could still do it. I don't mean to butt in, and every mom's got to figure out what works for her, and it sounds like you have a lot on your plate, BUT, if you're interested you might consider checking out La Leche League site: http://www.llli.org/ Most women can get their milk in without too much trouble with proper stimulation (uh... ask Chino for some help there! ha!) So, in case you were hoping to breastfeed, check with these guys before throwing in the towel.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Vadose - L.L.L. is the best right!? Actually my friend here -Sunshine- is a lactation consultant and has been helping my along the whole time. I've screwed the whole thing up but you're right and she assures me that I can still do it. I didn't think I'd be able to bring my milk supply back up - I need to pump every two hours and with Daisy screaming all the time I was lucky to do it 4 times a day - but now that she MIGHT be ok (cross your fingers) I actually have some hope! It's hell trying to get her back on the breast, I keep putting her to it and she gets all hysterical and pissed because she wants the bottle and not my stupid slow-feeding boobs but I'm not giving up just yet. Thank You for the mention, I don't consider it butting in at all, I hope we can do it :)

Blogget Jones said...

Daughter had a hard time finding something she could digest tolerably. In the process, I discovered she had a remarkable endurance for crying. And a sixth sense of when a mattress was getting too close to her little body. Which set her to crying, too.

Several years later, as I watched her run up to her room and oh-so-dramatically throw herself on her bed, sobbing all the way, I realized the endurance for crying wasn't related to her stomach or sleeping. My daughter loves a good cry.

BUT in between, she's brilliant :o)

Hang in there, kiddo. It really does get better.

Gringa-n-Mexico said...

Blogget - So Daisy is going to be a dramatic one for sure :) Hang in there, aw geez can't she be 5 already??

Sparx said...

Oh gal, I'm so sorry - we didn't have colic thankfully but friends have suffered through it. I'm guessing there's nothing I can suggest that you won't have tried... swaddling sounds like a good suggestion, it helps a lot of things with small babies, makes them feel secure too. Good luck and this will end.

Refried Dreamer said...

Hey Gringa, another problem i had with my colicky baby, despite the teas and tummy rubbing and what not, is that when I put him on formula, (which was rather soon. Booby sucking didn't work for me either.) We guessed, in an attempt to find SOME solution, that maybe it was the formula. We took him off regular Enfamil and put him on the SOY one... no lactose and it helped his tummy ALOT. He is now a soy junkie.

p.s. formulas have changed since i had mine, try Enfamil Gentlease first, for babies with gas and fussiness for a few weeks, then ProSobee.