I woke up the other morning to see the neighbors poodle outside of our fence whimpering and pacing back and forth. My dog Pooper the Pit bull went up to the fence to make nice and they seemed to be hitting it off quite well. Every time Pooper would walk away the Poodle would stand on his hind legs like in the picture and wave his two front paws up and down in the air - it was adorable!!
Fast forward a half hour and I looked outside my window to see THIS. The little bastard actually squeeeezed it's way through the top half of the bars and came on over to make a bitch out of my dog!
Poor Pooper, he thought that the Poodle wanted to PLAY with him and kept trying to get something going but the Poodle had a SERIOUSLY one point objective.
For a while I thought the poodle was an in heat girl poodle that was a tad confused about how this process is supposed to work, and watched curiously to see if Poop would try and get on the bandwagon himself. After a few minutes though I notice - the Poodle had a DOODLE!
I had a queer Poodle trying to rape my poor baby Pit Bull!! I have nothing wrong with homosexuality - what ever floats your boat is FINE by me - but breaking and entering, then forcing oneself upon an Innocent is no good for any gender preference!
Look at my poor baby! By this point he was heartbroken that his new friend wouldn't play with him so he just gave up, sat down and let it happen.
Or, maybe he was smart and was hiding his cornhole, I don't know.
It didn't take me long to shoo out Mr. Doodles and unfortunately it took Mr. Humpity D. even LESS time to come strait back through my bars for another round.
I chased his ass out about 4 different times before I finally had to use the hose. If all else fails, hose 'em down.
LOOK AT HIS FACE!! Isn't that the saddest look you've ever seen on a Pit Bull??? He looks ashamed and used. Poor baby boy, Mama got rid of that ole hor.
Truthfully I'm not sure what the whole episode was about, we've lived here for like 5 months now and the Gay Poodle has never flown his freak flag before so I don't know what triggered this episode.
Perhaps there was a bitch in heat near by and his lil nose couldn't differentiate? OR maybe he was experimenting with long pent up homoerotic urges?? Shit if I know but he better not rape my dog anymore or I'll be forced to go to the neighbors and use my limited Spanish to bitch at them.
This is the best I can come up with with my limited vocab - I'll translate it to English - "Your dog in my yard. Inside my fence. Wants sex from my dog. Both are boys. My dog no want sex. Your dog is gay. Please no more."
It's the best I can do because Chino won't help me, he's embarrassed for some reason, I don't get it.