Now that Daisy is 5 months old Chino and I seem to be getting our lives back together, routines, sleep schedules and such and I'm thrilled to say that our sex life is fiiiinnnnaaaallyyyy back to where it should be. Nothing to throw off a sex life like a baby - lol - who knew?
Anyhoo, in celebration of our new found happiness we brought in a prop the other night for an added bit-o-fun - a simple chair. Someone who-shall-remain-unnamed had a stripper style forward-sitting position fantasy and someone else was happy to comply.
La la ti da everything was going along quite nicely and I thought I was being pretty damn cool thank-you-very-much and decided to up the ante by including one of those bend-over-to-the-floor dealies. It would have been awesome had I not gone for the move so quickly and still had a bit of ole astroglide on my hands, because my hands did a quick !SLIP! out from underneath me on the tile floor. What is it about gettin' it on that makes me forget that I'm a klutz? Endorphins? Bastards.
Already unsteady from my precarious perched position it was inevitable that the aftermath of the slip would be great. One hand went one way the other hand sort of in the same direction and the next thing I know I'm no longer in the chair but flying in a roll sideways, hitting my head on the bedside, flinging a leg in the air for good measure managing to wing my husband and finally landing with a nice thud on my shoulder. Awesome. (And lol why did it take me 28 years to get that the "slippery when wet" signs are funny? How did I never GET that???)
After laughing my ass off/half crying for a good minute or so and assessing the minimal damage - bruised head, pissed off wrist and bruised shoulder I tried to stand up only to slip barefoot on the astroglide that screwed me up in the first place and ended up taking a knee to the tile once more. I'm telling you guys, astroglide really IS the shit.
Luckily my husband has a great sense of humor and gentlemanly helped me to the bed where we could finish what we started in a more fitting geriatric manner. Nothing wrong with doin' it old school, a lot less injuries that way.
Ah well, here's to getting back on track and as always - dorking it up.